{"id":38,"date":"2022-10-25T12:12:58","date_gmt":"2022-10-25T12:12:58","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/andreeacristinapopescu.com\/?p=38"},"modified":"2025-02-21T15:47:47","modified_gmt":"2025-02-21T15:47:47","slug":"how-i-went-from-being-a-depressed-amp-anxious-girl-to-becoming-an-energy-healer","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/andreeacristinapopescu.com\/?p=38","title":{"rendered":"How I went from being a depressed & anxious girl to becoming an energy healer\ud83d\udcab"},"content":{"rendered":"<\/p>\n<\/p>\n<\/p>\n
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Around 4 years ago I was going through one of the hardest times of my life. And it didn’t seem like it would end any time soon. <\/p>\n

I was feeling totally lonely and depressed. I had a goal in mind and I hoped that once I reach it I will be happy again. But as always, it’s not as linear as we like to think. So, I was working 2 jobs, from 9 am to 11 pm 5 days a week, working out almost every day wanting to lose weight in order to look a certain way, and in my free days, I would spend time with Martin and try to keep my mind off my worries. <\/p>\n

But soon enough, my body started giving me signals. “Hey, you can’t ignore me any longer.” So I started having the worst lower back pain of my life. I had two bumps in that area, that were getting bigger and bigger. My guess now, is it was my energetical body’s way of telling me I’m putting way too much weight on me, and also my physical body’s way of telling me I’m pushing myself too much in the gym and that wasn’t going to be sustainable long term. <\/p>\n

I mean, of course, I was losing weight, but I remember now, at the slimmest I’ve been, I still wouldn’t admit it. It was just a never-ending, never-satisfying desire to be skinny, to be beautiful, to be loved, to be validated, and to be happy – from the external world.  <\/p>\n

My back was killing me! It got so bad that laying down in bed would hurt. Sitting in a chair would hurt, and walking around would hurt. I had to take 5 minutes breaks from work to just go and stretch my hips and legs, and it would bring a few moments of relief before it would start to hurt again. <\/p>\n

So I asked the doctor, and he said it was normal. (Uhm, okay?) Then, I started going to massage therapy, and little did I know, that she was going to be my initial sign to walk toward a more spiritual path. During the massage, she asked me if I’m fulfilled in my work. And although initially, I found it weird that a masseuse asks me personal questions, I told her that no but I’m only doing it for a few more months to save up money so I can travel. She looked me in the eyes and told me that everyone has a way that their bodies communicate with us when something is up. And to be aware that my back pain and strong menstruation pain were giving me a message. <\/p>\n

I’m so grateful for that moment because that was when my mind opened up to psychosomatic issues. After that, we did another kind of therapy (I don’t remember the name) where I was holding a metal cylinder that scanned my whole body. I got the results from her and she told me that I am super dehydrated (so true! since some days I would go until 5 pm forgetting to drink water), that I had a deficiency in iron, vitamin C, magnesium, and much more. <\/p>\n

She recommended me some natural and organic supplements and told me to work out WAY less. To give my back a break in order to help heal it. So together with massage, supplements, and the awareness that I had to take care of my body, the pain started to become less.<\/p>\n

As I was scrolling on my Instagram explore page one day, I find this woman. She was living in Tenerife with her husband and newborn baby, and she emanated this beautiful energy. In almost every post and in her stories she was asking these weird questions and talking to the Universe. I thought “Hm, that’s weird! I like it!”  So I messaged her and asked her what’s that all about. <\/p>\n

She told me it’s called Access Consciousness and that I should read the book “Being you, changing the world” by Dr. Dain Heer. So I got the book, I started reading it and then I put it aside. <\/p>\n

A few weeks later Martin and I traveled to Mexico. Here I only kept one of my jobs, which was tutoring English to Chinese students. I had to wake up at 5 am every day to deal with burnt-out kids that were soo tired that they couldn’t (and frankly didn’t want to) focus any longer. This town was full of mosquitoes, my back pain returned and it was as bad as ever, I had nervous breakdowns every day, and worst of all – all my hope that it will all be better when I travel again… was shattered. <\/p>\n

I felt hopeless, totally alone, and totally depressed, I didn’t know what to do, and I was crying every day. My inner child (I didn’t know that at the time) was coming to the surface every day and there was no safe space to deal with all that – I wasn’t going to therapy, my support system was an ocean away, and Martin was doing his best but really he didn’t know any tools to help me. There was anyways so much pressure on him already from the previous months of him being my rock. Basically, neither of us didn’t know what to do. <\/p>\n

Until one day I remembered this woman and the book she recommended to me. So I continued reading it. I even got the audiobook so I can listen easier. While I was listening I felt like Dr. Dain was talking directly to me about everything that has been happening. And with each clearing and sentence, I heard from that book I started feeling lighter and lighter. Then, I started asking the questions I learned in the book myself “How does it get any better?” “What else is possible” “What choices are there available here that I haven’t yet considered?” And many more. <\/p>\n

One day, I got the inspiration to make an Upwork profile. I just spent a few hours putting in there my education and experience. And then I left it. Kept asking questions and listening to the book. And one day around 2 weeks after opening up a profile, I get an interview invitation for a Marketing Agency. I couldn’t believe it. I was jumping up and down with happiness and at that moment I knew it was something I created through the tools and questions I learned from the book. I had the interview and it went amazing. And there I had it, a totally new job, remote, flexible – I could work whatever hours I decided, no one checked, as long as I delivered my tasks. So I could quit the job that made me wake up at 5 am.<\/p>\n

I was a Bacalar Lake – a turquoise paradise, where you feel like in the Maldives. After a day of freelancing, I went swimming and I remember how the clouds were reflecting in the mirror clear water, and they looked like cotton candy in the sky. I felt so peaceful, I felt like the energy of the Earth, the water, and the sky, were all there to play with me, and remind me that life isn’t as ugly as my mind was making it to be. That afternoon I finished listening to the book, and one of the last sentences was “Get your bars ran.”  <\/p>\n

I took that magical moment as a sign, so I knew my next choice will be to find a facilitator and book my first Access Bars session. As we were walking back to our Airbnb, we decided to travel to New York City for a few weeks, and we will watch the 4th of July fireworks over Manhatten. That evening I went home and looked up Facilitators in New York – and without checking the names or anything like that, I just looked at the photos and perceived the energy of the people there. I scrolled and scrolled and scrolled, even to another page I think. Until I immediately stopped in front of this gorgeous lady with pinkish hair and intense beautiful eyes. In that instant I knew – She is my healer! Her name was Josa Goodlife. <\/p>\n

I emailed her and we set up a meeting for when I would arrive in NYC. My great-aunt offered us to stay at her place for as long as we needed, but I didn’t know the address so I told Josa that I’ll text her for her address when I arrive. <\/p>\n

One week later, after attending our friend’s wedding in Fort Lauderdale, we got to NYC. We were staying in Greenpoint, Brooklyn. On my 2nd day there I was impatient, I wanted to run my bars ASAP! Because my overthinking was at its peak and I just wanted it to stop. So, expecting a long public transport journey to Josa’s place, I ask her to send me her address. She does, I put it in my google maps. And there you had it – 5 min WALK! <\/p>\n

Wait…what?! I was confused. I thought it was an error from Google maps, so I closed the app and started it again. Again, a 5 min walk. Her address was 4 blocks from my great aunt’s place. What were the chances? Without knowing my great aunt’s address! Without knowing Josa’s address. And choosing her only from her photo… At that moment I felt a wave of chills all over my body. And I felt that this choice of meeting with Josa was totally arranged by a higher force. God, the Universe, Consciousness, however, you want to call it. <\/p>\n

I went to a session, I met her and I loved her energy, her home, and her beautiful dog called Dottie. I didn’t say anything all the session, it was super quiet. My mind was racing though. I was thinking about every little or big thing that came to my mind. I was worried that it was super expensive and that maybe it was not gonna work and I would have wasted $120, that I’m too f*cked up and I’m a lost cause so it will not work on me, or that it was a scam. Anyways, I trusted Josa and the book I read and I totally surrendered. <\/p>\n

When the session finished, I paid Josa and I went on my way. I went out of her building and I started walking. Immediately I felt something different. Like everything was way more colorful. Like people smiled more at me like everything was somehow more vibrant. WOW! I thought – what’s happening? I think the session did something. <\/p>\n

The next day, I was sitting by the window watching the street. After a while (I don’t know how long) I notice something that initially worried me. “For the past minutes, my mind was empty! No thoughts, no overthinking, no worries! What?? This didn’t happen sober for literally years!” And then I knew that the session definitely helped. <\/p>\n

I messaged Josa and told her about it. And she was so happy for me that she invited me to a certification class she was hosting that weekend. I looked at the price of $350. That was what I earned in one month as a freelancer working 10h per week. I knew I couldn’t afford it, but something inside me told me a had to go. So I started asking around people I knew who also practiced Access Bars if they think it was worth it. A friend told me that there are different prices for different prices and that I should tell Josa I’m from Romania (a lower-income country). She then said that it is true, and the price for Romanians was $200. OKAY! We’re getting somewhere, now, how do I get the $200? I asked the Universe. <\/p>\n

The next day my great-aunt comes to visit us. I didn’t meet her in so many years and I was so happy to see her again this time in New York, the place I heard so much about but never got the chance to experience until then. Spending time with her was so sweet, it reminded me of my sweet grandparents, and in full honesty, I could admit that I missed having my family around me. There is unconditional love and understanding that only your family can gift you. When she was about to leave, she took an envelope from her purse and handed it to me. “Here, this is a gift from me and your parents.” “Thank you, Tusi! I’m so grateful!” <\/p>\n

After she left, I looked inside… and I was stunned. Inside that envelope, there were 2 banknotes of $100. This was exactly the money I needed to go to the course in 2 days and become an Access Bars Practitioner. <\/p>\n

Again, I felt like a higher power, the universe,  consciousness, and earth, totally have my back. It all was so aligned! Like you can’t make it up! I knew at that moment that all the questions I was asking, the clearings I was doing, choosing to show up and start working on myself, going to that session, and investing in my well-being – it was the right path to walk on. This was as clear as daylight and loud as ocean waves – this was divine timing! <\/p>\n

I attended that class. And it was beyond my comprehension. During the sessions received she asked me if I’m happy with my work and money situation and I started crying – that was such a powerful release I had to have in order to become aware of the boxes I put myself in all my life in order to be accepted and loved by my family for all the sacrifices they did that I could have a better life. <\/p>\n

And during the first session I ever gave, I felt like this was where I belonged. Being with people, in person, being there to support and contribute, being the space for them to open up and release anything that has been pulling them down. I felt the energy in my fingers, arms, and all throughout my being for the first time – and I knew I was a healer. <\/p>\n

That moment opened up a totally new life path. And all the other little moments before, all led to this portal of transformation within myself. <\/p>\n

The gratitude I feel now looking back in time at that closed-off, shy, anxious girl I was 3 years ago. I would like to go and give her a tight warm hug and tell her that everything will be okay. She will persevere and there will be very hard moments she will go through, but also very beautiful moments – and through all, she will grow, she will shift, she will fly, from a shy caterpillar to a gorgeous butterfly, and finally become a fierce dragon of change. I know she would never believe me that she could ever be a butterfly (let alone a dragon) – I rather think she would ask me what I smoked. But deep down, she knew. She knew that there is something on the other side of her depression. And that she couldn’t just ignore it forever, because maybe the most beautiful treasure could be hidden under there. <\/p>\n

Plot twist: This is the story of how I went from an anxious, sad, shy girl to an anxious, sad, shy energy healer (lol!) But this was just the beginning! <\/p>\n

What followed (and I’m still in process as life moves and evolves with us) were 3 years of resisting, surrendering at times, resisting, even more, trusting, healing myself and healing others, being in community, being in the question, and being the beautiful energy of change I knew it was possible for this world. <\/p>\n

How does it get any better? Thank you for being here and reading thus far. <\/p>\n

If you feel called to, leave me a comment about what awareness you had while reading this story \ud83d\ude4f<\/p>\n

And if you\u2019d like to delve deeper into your own self-healing journey, I\u2019m offering in-person 1 on 1 energy healing sessions (access bars, reiki, and body healing) and online reiki and body healing sessions. You can contact me for a booking here. <\/a><\/p>\n

Stay free, stay magical, stay true to yourself \ud83e\udd8b<\/p>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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